Montauk Summer Wedding.
Understated is the new luxury. I’m not even totally sure that’s true because the actual truth is that in my experience the clients that I have that most fit the “luxury” label are often the most willing to simply have a good time where budget isn’t a key constraint instead of extravagance being a key focus. Montauk, New York is however about as luxury as it’s going to get for a destination wedding in the continental United States. Driving out of Manhattan all the way to the very end of Long Island takes you through a few of the most iconic places that define old luxury in the country. The Hamptons is a hodgepodge of billionaires and beach goers and once you go to where you can’t go any more (they call it the end) you land in the tiny town of Montauk.
It’s kind of the perfect place to dive into a topic I’ve wanted to cover on this blog for ages : what is a “luxury wedding” AND how can you host one? There’s a touch of irony here if I’m honest because there is essentially no such thing as a “luxury” client googling “how to have a luxury wedding”. That irony is important to point out because here’s the truth, luxury isn’t easily defined. How about instead we juxtapose the entire idea with something easier to understand : “how to create a beautiful wedding that feels extremely high end when there is actually a budget”. That’s something I can get behind and here’s a few quick tips I’ve learned from hanging out at million dollar weddings, and extremely DIY weddings, and all of the weddings in between over the last 15 years.
You don’t get rich by saving money. It’s always going to be easier to make $10k than it is to save $10k. That’s just the nature of a free market and when it comes to planning a high end wedding you need to realize that though everything can cost a lot being intentional on where you invest your money can help you really maximize what you’re getting in return.
Invest in vendors that don’t play games. This isn’t an under promise - over deliver world any more. In fact that was always a pretty stupid business strategy. Instead high end wedding vendors know their value, can demonstrate it consistently and are often extremely capable and willing to help you make your investment go a long way with them. For example, I know that I’m one of the more expensive photographers in my region in Arkansas, let alone when I’m traveling into other places which means that I have to place a high emphasis on client experience, return on their investment, and the highest quality product possible if I want to keep my place in the market. Remember what I said, nobody is googling this stuff. My marketing comes mostly from referrals both from happy clients and (here’s the real secret) happy vendors.
Once you pick a wedding vendor you absolutely can’t live without (and feel like you can trust) ask them for their friends. Not a cheesy vendor list, not a referral program (run away if you smell that BS in the air) but their friends. When people ask me what wedding planners I love to work with I can’t wait to tell them! And because I have worked with planners all over the country I have regional suggestions for them! The same goes for bands, florists, and even dress shops. I love sharing the names of my friends because at the end of the day when my clients hire friends it makes doing my job easier and making them happy instantly more attainable!
It’s ok not to go overboard. I actually intentionally picked this wedding for this topic because of this very point. Again I’ll say it, Montauk is swanky. This could easily have been a million dollar blow out black tie event but two things would have had to change for that to happen : 1, Claire + Jack would have had to completely alter their vision for what experience they wanted their guests to have and 2, everybody would have had to somehow ignore that we were standing in a big beautiful tent in the middle of a garden just minutes from the beach. Luxury doesn’t mean flashy, it means that money isn’t the deciding factor remember? These two didn’t choose these flowers because it was all they could afford, they chose them because they were what they wanted. The same with the dress, the tuxedo, the shoes, the dj, the venue, and yes - even the photographer. I wasn’t purchased because I was expensive, nor was I purchased despite me being expensive. I was hired as an investment into the memories of this amazing couple and their families and cost mattered of course, but not more than selecting the right choice. No matter your wedding budget - I’m willing to bet you can take a bit of that intentionality and implement it too.
Don’t spread your ideas too thin. You don’t need to have a laser party, and a DJ, and a string quartet, and a reception gown, and passed appetizers, and 4 signature cocktails, and 4 dinner options, on and on and on. The sky is the absolute limit with weddings but the smartest most refined thing you can do is to pick a lane and stay in it. If you want a beach wedding, a ballroom wedding, a museum wedding, a barn wedding, a garden wedding - have it. But stick to it and it will show consistency in your photos, be a breath of fresh air for your checkbook, and allow your guests to have a really elevated experience.
OK, so that’s kind of it. We’re prepping blogs from events and weddings from all over the place right now and the direction I really want to start to take with this blog over the coming months is one of educating you guys, the people that stumble in here either as couples, or photographers, or just industry pros on the simple lessons we’ve learned over 15 years in this industry. Need some more wedding day Inspo? You might love these other articles that are pretty similar!
